You might think there would be no better way to prepare for a softball game than batting practice and drills, but in reality, or at least in the Lovett version of it, taking care of a bag of powdered wheat grains apparently does the trick.
A few weeks back members of Lovett softball were randomly “handed a plain bag of flour,” by their coach according to senior Evy Galbraith, and told to love and protect it as their “flour child.” One bag went to the players from each grade.
While the girls were initially confused by this random assignment, it soon became clear that being a mother takes determination, teamwork, and planning, just like the sport itself.
Each girl took turns guarding their child with their lives. Whoever did the best job would receive points, and the team with the greatest number of points would win. They texted ‘check-ins’ every two hours to their GroupMe, in order to track their progress and ensure their kid did not tragically explode, rip, or get baked into a cake.
Sparrow, the senior baby, was carefully protected by each player and was even dressed in Lovett clothing and pushed around in a student-made stroller. I first encountered Sparrow, as he was being pushed through the Black Box Theater by Evy, heading to her Design and Production class. He was wearing black glasses and a chain, and I quickly grew envious of his incredible fashion sense.
From then on, I would constantly scan the hallways for Sparrow to observe the team’s progress. In many classes, he was given a seat and had to listen to lectures and lessons, like in Marine Biology, even though he couldn’t get near the water of the fish tanks without turning to goo. And yet, he still became the smartest bag of flour to ever exist and applied early decision to Rice University
Apparently, Sparrow’s makeshift stroller and newfound education kept him alive, and he was the only baby left standing out of every grade’s team, as all of his siblings were “tragically” murdered. The juniors even scattered the ashes of their child at the football game against Pace Academy, thus resulting in a failed mission. But, Sparrow still prevailed.
“For the seniors, it became about more than just taking care of a bag of flour,” said Evy. “We bonded over coming up with new, creative ideas to earn points and get ahead of the other grades.” She even claims that “Sparrow is the superior flour baby,” showing a fierce motherly love for her new child.
Who knew caring for a bag of everyday flour would transform into a collective bonding experience between the members of the Lovett softball team? The coach's methods were successful, and each girl improved their teamwork skills while also getting a taste (no pun intended) of what motherhood is all about.
Next time you think about joining softball, don’t just prepare with a copious amount of training. Consider driving to your nearest Publix or Kroger and buy a simple bag of all-purpose flour, and you may just be the greatest athlete to ever exist.